“All self-talk is self-coaching. If your internal coach sucks… get a new one…”
When you stop to think about it, it is quite simple. If you do not treat yourself with the same respect you offer to others – you are letting yourself down.
Consider that your inner “monkey mind” dialogue/self-talk/whatever you want to call it is simply your on-going coaching dialogue about events, circumstances and situations. If it contains more than a trace amount of negative self-commentary; you need to fire your inner voice. It is a crappy coach.
It’s very simple – if your chattering monkey mind says mean things to you, or comments negatively – tell yourself “NO. That simply won’t do. YOU are an idiot if you think calling ME an idiot will work. I am not accepting this.” Replace “you are an idiot” with something that moves you to change.
You have to train YOURSELF in better behavior.
Putting yourself down constantly will do no more good on the inside than it would on the outside.
You know the standards for good communication with other people. Use them as a guide for good internal communication.
This has been accomplished by most successful people. It is not as difficult as you might imagine but it is a necessary step to debugging your mind and creating more productive habits.
You see… it is YOU doing it to YOU. And your first self-improvement “hack” is to learn to stop one thing… and start doing something different.
If you are talking to yourself in a mean, dispiriting way – it HASN’T worked to make you a better and happier person; it WON’T work to make you a better and happier person; you need to change it; and you can… with application of consistent effort, in small amounts.
It’s the perfect practice ground for habit de-bugging.
Catch yourself in the act. Say “No!” Correct it.
It doesn’t take long, but it does take some persistence…